My boyfriend is sick. He has diverticulitis. He’s on heavy-duty antibiotics and may need to be admitted to the hospital. Monday evening, I was explaining this to Critter. He asked, “Is he going to die?” He asked the question so matter-of-factly that it took me by surprise. I responded that in all likelihood he would recover. Then my son said, “Well, if he goes to the hospital and they can’t make him better he’ll die.” I scrambled to put a good spin on this because while my boyfriend is ill, and it is somewhat serious, the changes of him dying are slim. I tell my son, with all the conviction I could muster while trying not to laugh hysterically, that it wasn’t going to come to that. His response? “Well, if he dies can I go to the funeral?”. At this point I gave up all pretense of seriousness and said that of course he could go to the funeral.
I have not sheltered my son from death. It happens and to everyone. Hopefully the person lives a long and healthy life but eventually everyone dies. In our Church we mourn for our loss but celebrate that the departed are with Christ and God in Heaven. Christopher has gone to funerals since his great-grandfather passed away when Critter was about 18 months old. He’s witnessed the passing of people with many years behind them and he’s witnessed the passing of a 17 year old boy who died of leukemia. This past weekend he did not attend the funeral of our fellow parrishioner who died at the age of 93 and I think he felt a bit left out and wanted to make sure he wouldn’t miss my boyfriend’s funeral. While he has a health respect for death I think he sees funerals as a bit of a social event, something that he’s missed out on if he doesn’t attend. I guess in a way funerals are social from the standpoint that the living gather to remember the dead and to help each other mourn.
I only hope we don’t have to attend another funeral for a very long time.
